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Archive for the ‘Marriage’ Category

The wonder of marriage is woven into the wonder of the gospel of the cross of Christ, and the message of the cross is foolishness to the natural man, and so the meaning of marriage is foolishness to the natural man  (1 Cor. 2:14).

John Piper

11 years ago today the Lord gave us the gift of marriage… today we reflect on this gift of love, this display and reality of the gospel.

For a shocking, 4, 015 days we have made the choice to love one another, to live the gospel… it hasn’t always been easy, there were days that we both wanted to decide to not love but were unable to. We were meant to be together, meant to stay together. We have become one and no man or feeling can seperate us.

Love as distinct from “being in love” is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity,  maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by the  grace which both partners ask, and receive from God. They can have this love for  each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love  yourself even when you do not like yourself.

C.S. Lewis

We have no time to really pause and celebrate, soak it all in but we are living the day out in thanksgiving for one another and for the One who brought us together.

I am thankful today for love, this mystery fruit of the Spirit and for this man that holds my heart {forever} captive…

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The sun is up this morning and so am I, reluctantly. I would love to sink back into bed for an hour or so but know that little feet will begin filling the hallway in minutes.  Each morning my husband gets up at 5:20am to spend time in the word before he is forced by the gravities of life and the will of God to head off to work, Eli joins him and they spend some reading/coffee time together. I, already mostly awake after his alarm goes off at 5:20 wait and savor my 25 more minutes to lay beneath the refuge of my covers. At 5:45 when my alarm finally goes off I greet the still dark room with bitterness at first glance and then  slowly apologize and almost litterally fall out of bed, grab my robe, wash my face and head into the kitchen to start breakfast for my man. Sometimes I wonder why am I doing this? I could sleep till 7:00 or so and still have time to have my quiet time with my Savior… but when I walk in the kitchen and I see my husband’s smiling face and hear his sweet “Good morning” I remember… because I SO love him and I long to spend as much time with this man as I can before he departs and is seperated from us from once 8 but now 10 hours. Because he deserves it and  needs that early morning time as much I feel I do, we need eachother. Each morning I hate to see him walk out the door but I know that God has called him to minister to all the men in his workplace and He has called me to minister to all the little children in my workplace, we both have set before us a joyful ministry filled with hours of hard work and hard hearts and we both know with out saying that we need eachother before we head alone into those callings and that we both need Him and so each morning at 5:20 and 5:45 we rise before the sun, we eat and we drink from His blessing and His cup each morning and pray.  

Wives, savor each moment with your beloved husbands, for this is just a momentary marriage, sacred and holy. We are a picture of the most sacred union, between Christ and His church. Each morning we gather together in a holy communion before the dawn of life and trials begin and then we wait for eachother’s reunion. I wait till he comes as we wait for His coming. I am the bride at home anxiously awaiting the arrival of my bridegroom! Let this be a heavenly reminder for us to prepare daily for our Bridegroom to return… He is coming and we do not know the hour, so let us make the best use of our time.

God patterned marriage purposefully after the relationship between His Son and the church, which He planned from eternity. And therefore marriage is a mystery; it contains and conceals a meaning far greater than what we see on the outside. What God has joined together in marriage is to be a reflection of the union between the Son of God and His bride the church. Those of us who are married need to ponder again and again how mysterious and wonderful it is that we are granted by God the privilege to image forth stupendous divine realities infinitely bigger and greater than ourselves. 

John Piper 

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I am not sure how it happened but I guess in my blog move I somehow left a dear sweet encouraging friend behind. Sarah from In Light of the Truth. I providentially stumbled across her encouraging blog late last night and found a bright ray of inspiration in her Monday Meanderings and so thought I would join to bring my mind and heart together at the begining of the week in all of the things that I desire to accomplish, walking faithfully, making the best use of my time both physically and mentally. Thanks Sarah!

Bible Study – Spending time each morning in the Old Testament, currently in Deuteronomy, Proverbs each afternoon with Eli and then sporatic Spirit led reading through out the day.
Memory VerseEphesians 5:15-17 “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.”

Husband Encouragement
First and always foremost to submit to him as to the Lord.
To put his needs above my own not matter how I feel!
Have laundry washed, folded and put away, entry way living spaces cleaned, clothes ready for next days work, coffee ready for next morning, kids fed, loved and happily and quietly awaiting his arrival and a joyful and inviting spirit when he walks in the door.
Ask him how his day was and allow him to relax before any demands are put on him, as well as not dumping my day on him until he asks.
Everyday have something special done and waiting for him…
To pray diligently for him through out the day.

Train Them Up
Pray for them daily and specifically.
To lead them to the cross daily through loving them and turning their hearts toward their Father.

Personal Goals
To be a faithful mother and wife at home striving for holiness… remembering that I must decrease so He can increase.
To seek insight like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, so that I will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God. Proverbs 2:4-5
To PRAY intentionally and passionately daily.
To finish The Shaping of a Christian Family.
Walk at least 3 times this week, do pregnancy exercises, eat healthy small meals, watch sugar intake and caffiene consumption.
Enjoy my 4th pregnancy and trust God with all the details of the birth!
Write in my journal daily

MUST Do’s
Adoption letter for friend!
Letter to Compassion child
Make Mother’s day gifts

Zone – Boys and Girl Room

Menu Plan

M- Crockpot Potato Chowder and Cornbread
T – Pizza and Salad
W – Mexican Pile On for Bible Study!
Th – Tacos and Mexican Rice
F – Sandwiches for on the road to Grandma’s house 😉
S – Grandmas House Cooking
Su – Chicken and Rice with Peas and Bread

dessert of the week: Strawberry Shortcake

FUN THINGS!
Friends over for dinner Monday and Tuesday night!
Sewing, sewing , sewing ( I hope)
Craft day with my sisters Thursday afternoon!

3 Things I’m Thankful for Today:
The Word of God
My 4 amazing children one of which I am anxiously waiting to meet in July!
My God fearing husband!!

Encouraging Quote:

“All work done for God is spiritual work and therefore not merely a duty but a holy privilege.” Elisabeth Elliot, The Shaping of a Christian Family

 

Seek what is pleasing to the Lord and make the best use of your time wives, mothers and homekeepers for the days are evil! Let us be faithful and wise serving the Lord for we do not know the day nor the hour of our Master’s return, oh that glorious day!!

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Have you ever opened your eyes to the graces of a new and glorious day only to proclaim deep with in your heart to God that you just don’t know if you can do it again today instead of trusting and submitting to His promise… “my grace is sufficient for you”? Even you my exhausted and overwhelmed child and mother to my precious children. “My burden is light and my yoke is easy” How often do our own children tell us “but momma I can’t do it!” and we reply to their weakness with love “Yes you can, I will help you” only to be saddend by their  unwillingness to allow you the access to their heart, to lift their burden and guide them through their weakness.   I realize now how often I cry out to God in the morning and then reject His help, His guidance, His grace for me through out the day. It is not that He is not supplying me with enough, for God does not lie, it is I who has not trusted in His promise, been humbled before His throne of grace and displayed a broken and contrite heart before the Almighty God who is sufficient for ALL of my needs and is my power in weakness, even in my motherhood inadequacies.  Each morning we are told that “The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;  his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:21-23 and yet we so often live seperated from this reality; from His reality by choice… it is a conscious choice we decide to make with the wakening of the new day.

Grace is not something we can earn, it is a gift. Often times for me I pray for His grace and then I try to earn it somehow through out the day. In order for us to receive His unmerited favor we must choose to become weak, to be humbled. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in what? In strength? In pride or arrogance? In weakness! His grace is sufficient for those who are willing to make themsleves weak so that His power can be made perfect through them, dispite them, giving all glory and honor to Him. The power to live a ressurected life comes from Him and Him alone… John proclaims this weakness, this humility, this humbleness in John 3:30 when he says “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

Listen to this quote by C.H. Spurgeon:

“Observe how weak we are, how strong He is, how proud we are, how condescending He is, how erring we are, and how infallable He is, how changing we are, and how immutable He is; how provoking we are, and how forgiving He is. Observe how in us there is only ill, and how in Him there is only good. Yet our ill but draws His goodness forth, and still He blesseth. Oh! What a rich contrast!

Oh observe! But we don’t observe it often enough how weak we are and how strong He is and that is why I believe for myself I miss out of His boundless supply of grace for each day.

“God opposes the proud, but give grace to the humble.” James 4:6

He will not pour out His grace upon us so long as we feel as though we deserve only good things to come our way. It is very easy to deceive ourselves into thinking we are a humble people but when things are going our way but when our peace is disturbed and challenged by everyday or life changing trials do we become angry? Why? Did we feel in some way an heir of arrogance in that we didn’t deserve for that to just happen to us? In that sliver of a moment did we humble ourselves  and receive His grace? I know that I am tempted all day to believe that I deserve good things to happen to me and so when they are confronted I become quickly irritated and I ask the fist shaking question… why? Why me? I didn’t deserve that! 

Oh to walk the road pathed in grace, to become less for the sake of Him becoming more! To embrace weakness and humility for the glory and power of God to radiate through our broken vessels our broken lives. It is in our brokeness that we find His strength, it is in being humbled before grace that He is made Lord of our lives.

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“What would happen if God’s people believed His promises and laid hold on Him in prayer, believing Him for the impossible-for reconciliation of broken marriages, for the salvation of unbelieving friends and relatives, for spiritual transformation of wayward children, for a fresh outpouring of His Spirit in genuine revival? We might see God release from heaven the greatest awakening our world has ever known.”  Biblical Womanhood in the Home (emphasis added)

I wonder what would happen if we truly did believe… with our hearts and with our faith rather than with our eyes and understanding. I know it is hard, believe me I know. It is not always easy to simply believe but in all of my experiences with God He has taught me that in everything, everthing whether it be the most devasting situation you can imagine for your life or the simpliest everyday situation He is faithful and keeps His promises. Maybe not how I wanted Him to or in my quick timing but He is always faithful, faithful if I will but wait on Him and put my trust in Him. It takes me resting simply in the truth that His will for my life is good and that He knows what is best for me. Do I believe God to be a good God, a good Father? If I did then everything in my life is good whether it feels good or not, it is good. I can look back on the most devasting place in my life and see that through it God was teaching me something, conforming me closer to His image, bringing about life even though it may have felt like death at times, revealing to me more of His glory, pruning His child’s heart, working His power through me and showing me a more clear picture of Christ, drawing me closer to the cross… stripping my dependencies on myself away layer by layer, sometimes slowly and painfully.

Oh, let us just believe in His promises, rest in His will for our life embracing it for what it is and making ourselves available to be His servant.

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It is another exciting Marriage Monday and Honor Your Husbands Update. It is a little after ten as I write this, my family are all peacefully sleeping while I finish up some things. This last week in the challenge was pretty good with only a few minor pitfals. I am so amazed at the work that God is doing in my marriage and just in me through this challenge. Expresso the other day while we were just relaxing quitely wispered “Have you noticed how well we have been doing?” My heart grinned and I nodded. 

Thank you God… for this man… for my life… I am overwhelmed with gratitude.

Each night when I lay in bed next to my already sleeping husband I realized something… I am blessed.

How have I been doing with my goals? Well, not to brag or anything but AWESOME, he he! The Lord has been right by my side through out this challenge! giving me continual energy to honor my husband.  With keeping up with the house… I have done very good! Working hard to follow my task cleaning plan and keep the front of the house always straightened. Making my home more joyful and peaceful… I think I have made some good progress but still want to make some more. Rushing him after a function when I am ready… I need to be more consiouse of this one, I kind of forgot! But on another goal of showing him daily through random acts of kindness I have been shining! :0) I have been doing something special almost daily for him with things and I have thouroughly enjoyed myself. ANd something really big for me that I have been enabled to do is to let things go and not dwell on them and cause an unecessary argument, praise God!

Here are 3 new things that I will work on this week:

1. Jealousy. I have always been a pretty jealous wife. After having a baby I have noticed makes it worse. I don’t want to be jealous. I want my husband to know that I trust him. I want to trust him. I am really going to try not to make little remarks here and there about the pretty girl, I will hold my tongue and honor him by trusting him.

2. Attitude. A reason I think that I am more jealous after a baby is of course the extra weight and the attitude that I have about my body. I know that my husband loves me now even with the added weight and the frumpy clothes I have to wear but I don’t! But I don’t want to be that way anymore about the way I look or rather feel about the way I look.

3. Care. With that all said I will take better care of myself but not just physically but also spiritually. I know that something that my husband desires for me to do is to be in the word and to be growing spiritually. I would also like to be able to carry on a more intelligent and theological conversation with him so I will be advancing my theological vocabulary with big words. Which reminds me of something that I saw in the blogsphere recently, a spending time with the Lord challenge. (when I find the source I will give her credit, promise!) I want to start this so tomorrow I begin and will make it a 25 day challenge. Getting up every morning to spend some alone quiet time with the Lord in prayer and in devotion.

I am tired so I am now going to finish up my night time chores and then head for the bed…

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I have been visiting all of the amazing women who are joyfully participating in this God and husband honoring challenge. I have listened to their hearts pouring our their love for their God and their husbands  and I am so encouraged by them. It is encouraging just to know that I am not alone in this battle for honor and change. I am not a lonely warrior venturing on the battlefield with my sword and shield each day. There are many more out there and although I can not see them nor do I even really know them I feel strengthened by them and their journeys, their battles, their hearts. We are a mighty army.

During this challenge we are all facing obstacles of many kinds, some of them differ from eachother and then some of them we are all facing together. Christine asked a good question that started my mind wandering… What does my marriage communicate to those who don’t know me? I know that in our marriages we are not only showing others our love for eachother, our respect, our joy but also our love, respect and joy for and in the Lord. Our marriage reflects on Him who created it as does everything. In our marriages we are able to shine some light in the darkness of this divorced and adulterated world that love does and can last, that forgiveness is possible even in the impossible, that  happiness is real in, that it is a holy and sacred union between two people. 

The Lord revealed to me this last week that people looking in on our marriage are being affected by our reflection. Last week my husband came home and told me that a co-worker was talking to him about his marriage. He was telling my husband how his marriage was not going to well and how impressed he was with how I would get up and make him a good lunch and that he was living vicariously through our marriage. That was very encouraging to me and also very sobering. It opened my eyes to the fact that people are watching and it does have a possible lasting affect on them and possibly their own marriages. I pray that my marriage will reflect His glory to those peering in.

I am amazed at how much this challenge has motivated me to be a better wife and to see past myself. Through loving my husband with everything that I have I have been energized instead of drained. At the end of each day I can smile and know that he knows he is loved, respected and honored. This doesn’t mean that I have not stumbled and tripped over my own personal obstacles because I have. Sunday afternoon I tripped with my attitude and sour words.

Goals for this week besides last weeks  and the week before:

  • Keep Up! with this house! doing a lot of little extra things around here than usual. I asked Expresso what he thought was the most important part of the house… the areas that are seen. So I want to keep up with those for sure.
  • Make home joyful and peaceful as possible. Through my attitude and the atmosphere.
  • Try not to rush him after church or any other functions. I tend to get tired and want to go home earlier than he does and will sometimes interupt him to let him know that I am ready, I do it queitly but I don’t want to do it at all.

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